JUDGE WITH A PAST
A small town prosecuting attorney called his first
witness to the stand in a trial....a grandmotherly,
elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones,
do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams.
I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly,
you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you
cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about
them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big
shot when in truth you haven't the brains to realize you
never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper
pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do
he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do
you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why,
yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. I used to babysit him for his parents.
And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's
lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. The man
can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his
law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire
state. Yes, I know him."
At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to
silence and called both counselors to the bench. In a
very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you
asks her if she knows me, you'll be in jail for contempt
within 5 minutes!"
